The initial, raw paragraph:
- Dudana began to rock back and forth. The droning croon had resumed. She had her arms wrapped around her waist.
The first pass revision:
- Dudana wrapped her arms around her waist and began to rock back and forth. The droning croon resumed.
And that’s why I don’t like people reading my stuff until it’s ready.
(It’ll probably change again before I’m done.)