Q. You write?

On occasion.

Q. Is this that book you were writing in 1994? The one mentioned in that Sword and Sorceress intro?

Ladysmith Black Mambazo, I hope not.

Q. When’s the book you just wrote coming out?

It hasn’t sold yet. Can’t say.

Q. Who’s your agent?

No books sold yet. Can’t say.

Q. Do you have a social life?


Q. Do you ever sleep?

Only when I must.

Q. Can I be a first reader?

If I haven’t asked you to be one, then no.

Q. Can you hook me up with Famous Author X?

Contact his or her publishers or fanclubs. I am neither.

Q. Do you do redshirts?


Q. Will you read my stories?


You’ll hear that same answer from most professionals or semi-pros. Don’t be offended; this is mainly because we’re all either a) too busy or b) appropriately cautious. Yes, there have been lawsuits in the past initiated by fans and amateurs who submitted stories to authors to read. Even if I did have the time for it, I ain’t sticking my hands in that, and I hope you understand. I have my own stories to write.

If you want peer review, consider joining a writing club or going to a writing convention. Google up some if you don’t know of any.